My exercises in better understanding boundaries were truly tested over the past month and a half or so. This doesn't mean I faced difficulty for distancing myself from situations, but rather that they came in much more predictably. With my mom, my dad, friends, everything. I can't say I always made the best call, but with self-preservation and growth in mind I tried to make long-term decisions and roll with them. I'll apologize where I can, be stern other places, and be accepting of the man I am.
Courses come at me with various refracted angles and tracing each ray to its source is about 50/50 as to whether it's academically exciting or painfully stressful. I'm sunk to my ears in the muck and struggle of the semester, with no clear idea of what my GPA looks like right now but I'm enjoying the ride. I'm a much stronger swimmer for it.
Speaking of which, my body has come back to me. The durability of my high school days is glazing back over my bones and I'm finding each passing week I'm hitting more and running harder but aching less. My lifts across the board have improved, and my appearance expresses these increases plainly. The other day I invited friends over to join me for a quick Bible study + complimentary breakfast cooked by yours truly. Prayers fill my mind and like coals smoke out between my teeth, ears, and nostrils. Thanksgiving changes the way I hear, speak and experience the plains I walk. I'm even coming closer to having a beard. The world is basically my oyster at this point.
I serve my community. I serve my friends. I fall short and slip regularly, but it's always leaning forward into something better. I don't care how cheesy all of this is or isn't, because with boundaries in mind I'm doing something for me and only me. This blog's birth was the birth of the philosophy that I'm worth my own self-interest and since has placed me right where I needed to be (usually). I have God and the love he places in the people around me to thank for that. I know I'm far from finished...
And that's quite alright.
I serve my community. I serve my friends. I fall short and slip regularly, but it's always leaning forward into something better. I don't care how cheesy all of this is or isn't, because with boundaries in mind I'm doing something for me and only me. This blog's birth was the birth of the philosophy that I'm worth my own self-interest and since has placed me right where I needed to be (usually). I have God and the love he places in the people around me to thank for that. I know I'm far from finished...
And that's quite alright.
Comments
Post a Comment