I'd just like to thank God at this moment. Peace has been with me today. All last night and the day that preceded it, I called out for it without cease, and now without cease it resides in me. Being upset would be reasonable. Feeling sad would be reasonable. Being scared for a minute, disappointed, anything which almost took hold, would have been completely reasonable. But this peace I've known is a heart- and not a head- thing, so practicality has no place.
Prayers of thanks and gratefulness have seeped from my lips softly under breaths since the moment I woke and haven't stopped since. I felt, and still feel, so renewed. So I asked God for this day to give me a real opportunity to bless somebody today. Now I know there is no equation to these things, but more so today than any other, I've had numerous windows handed to me, and with each I've not felt satisfied. Content, yes, but I want to do more. Within seconds of finishing each gesture my heart leaps and bears me the question, what's next? Like a dog never too tired for petting I've run to my God and time and time again he's offered me yet another, smiling I imagine, as he asks "you want more?".
I don't know what the rest of this day holds, or what happenings the night will unveil before me in the day that comes. But I do know that I have somebody who's hand rests on my shoulder as he guides me, and in his grips the whole world lies in balance.
So I will continue to pray for: my own healing, that of those I hold dear, and steadfast love.
I will also continue to pray until my mind runs numb that I've not ruined a love that was more real, more true, than anything I've ever known. A love that woke me in the morning and whose call I never questioned. A love that put me to sleep with a hand full of hair, dreams, and the universe of this little human breathing quietly in peace, and filled my chest with joy.
I'm in no shape to move faster than a brisk walk. I have scar tissue from torn ligaments in my right ankle and a strained ligament behind my knee. But, if with everything she has, if she so chooses to run, I will give chase until my other ankle, and my other everything, tears too.
I will also continue to pray until my mind runs numb that I've not ruined a love that was more real, more true, than anything I've ever known. A love that woke me in the morning and whose call I never questioned. A love that put me to sleep with a hand full of hair, dreams, and the universe of this little human breathing quietly in peace, and filled my chest with joy.
I'm in no shape to move faster than a brisk walk. I have scar tissue from torn ligaments in my right ankle and a strained ligament behind my knee. But, if with everything she has, if she so chooses to run, I will give chase until my other ankle, and my other everything, tears too.
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